Stupid Stupid Stupid

I got this email today from a friend and I just had to share. Hope you enjoy. And thanks J.G. for the laugh.

Just think these might just really be true.......... Read and laugh or weep!!

Isn't it a shame that Stupid is not painful?!?!?

How do these people survive?

ONE
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets.
I asked for a half dozen nuggets.
'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the teenager at the counter.
'You don't?' I replied.
'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the reply.
'So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?'
'That's right.'
So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets
(Unbelievable but sadly true...)

TWO
I was checking out at the local Walmart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those 'dividers' that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed.
After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the 'divider', looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.
Not finding the bar code, she said to me, 'Do you know how much this is?'
I said to her 'I've changed my mind; I don't think I'll buy that today.'
She said 'OK,' and I paid her for the things and left.
She had no clue to what had just happened.

THREE
A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly.
When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM 'thingy.'
(keep shuddering!!)

FOUR
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. 'Do you need some help?' I asked.
She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?'
'Hmmm, I don't know. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked.
'No, just this remote thingy,' she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk....'
PLEASE just lay down before you hurt yourself !!!

FIVE
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use paper from the photocopier', the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five 'blank' copies.
Brunette, by the way!!

SIX
A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid had eaten ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and he should be fine, the mother says, 'I just gave him some ant killer......'
Dispatcher: 'Rush him in to emergency!'

Life is tough. It's even tougher if you're stupid!!!!

A Completely Pointless Post

The past few weeks have beeen busier than I like. The bathroom remodel is taking most of my time and it has been taking longer than I anticipated. But it looks like we are within a week or so of being finished...(crossing my fingers). The hardest part has been the fact that my house is a disaster area. It is disorganized and dusty from the sheetrock. I have a sink in the living room and supplies everywhere. I will be glad when it is all done and I can do some deep cleaning and organizing.

Add that to the fact that my Olympic obsession has cut my nights short. I can't seem to help myself. And going to bed after midnight is catching up with me. Yawn!!!

So I guess I need to get busy and get something done today.

A Moment of Levity.....

just some fun from my ultra talented brother and his friend. Enjoy!

Ping Pong Ball Boys

I have no idea why my sons are bouncing off the walls today but they are. Seriously they are running into each other and hopping from room to room and giggling and skipping. Wow! Gonna be a long day.

***Update****

I was listening to my little guys and they kept singing "Prices on the ground, prices on the ground and spinning around. They were cracking themselves up. So I looked up what they were saying and found this. They think this is hilarious and to be honest I find it comical that 2 grown men would allow cameras to film them acting this way.

Snow Fun

Me in the hunting lodge

Me sweet hubby & I

me and a huge Kodiak bear

the view from our bedroom window

My little snow bunnies

This post is to prove that we do in fact exist. Now there is picture proof.
And just in case you were wondering.....the pictures posted backwards. The kiddos were supposed to be first. I promise....I am not vain enough to post a pic of myself first...hahaha

Back to normal life

This past weekend my mother in law, my hubby, my sweet little boys and I went to visit family in the Atlanta area. It was like one of those weekends when the stars align and everything in the universe line up to give you an amazing time. I believe that God worked it all out for us. We left Friday morning and traveled north. By the time we had been on the road for an hour we were driving through snow. The boys started flipping out. All they talked about was playing in the snow when we arrived at our destination. By the time we got there the snow was 6 inches on the ground and beautiful. The boys baled out of the car and started a snow ball fight. It was great. I won't bore you with more snow details since I realize that so many people got to see snow this weekend. But we had a blast! By the next afternoon most of it had melted but we were so blessed to have been up there on that exact day. Such a God Thing!! My hubby took my camera today to show his buddies pics of the snow so I will post later this week with pics.

So today we are back home and back in the swing of things.

Iron Man

A few months ago I was flipping channels and ran across the Iron Man competition in Hawaii. I was totally floored as I watched people of various ages and physical conditions run this grueling race. There was a man that was over 70 years old and an young man with no legs. I could go on and on. Anyway I decided that I would like to run the Iron Man one day before I die. (here is to hoping and praying for a very long window of opportunity) So this thought has been in my head and I keep telling myself that I will follow through with this. Except for a couple of snags. I am a terrible swimmer. And when I say terrible I mean I can't swim very well at all. I look like a dog that didn't pay attention the day God was instrusting all dogs on how to swim. Yes, it is that bad. Snag #2 is that I haven't ridden a bicycle in about 18 years. Not even sure if I could balance on one at this point. But the biggest snag is that I HATE running. I wish I liked running but I don't. So while I have this grand idea of running and even finishing the Iron Man I realize that I will have to become a pod person or something to achieve this lofty goal.

Maybe my first goal should be to actually exercise at least a little bit every day. Because right now its not happening. Not unless you count playing the Wii Fit with the kids.

I said all of that to say that I was blog surfing this evening and almost half of the blogs that were "randomly" brought up were of people who are cyclists, runners, mountain climbers, etc. So I am rethinking my Iron Man idea.

Maybe a great life goal would be to try as many different types of cheesecake as I can. That sounds yummy!

A Little Late To The Party

My brother mentioned a couple of years ago that he thought we (hubby & I) would like the show 24. I have learned over the years that me and my brother have very different tastes in movies and television. So when he told us about it we blew him off. He just kept on and on about it though. So recently my dad mentioned that he had started watching them too. He had the seasons on DVD and offered to loan them to us. Well, that has started an obsession for me and hubby. We stay up way too late watching 4 & 5 episodes a night. We can't seem to help ourselves. I realize that everyone else out there already knows about the phenomenon that is "24" but I have been busy being a momma to 2 small boys so I am a little late to the party. We will be starting season 4 this week. So here is to not getting enough sleep and finally finding something that the hubby & I both want to watch together.

Fail Us Not

I heard this song several months ago when I was having a tough time with some things. I LOVE the words and the tune stays with you all day. It is such a wonderful declaration of all that God is and is willing to do.

Brain Overload

We all know that it has been a while since I have blogged regularly. Well during that time I had to deprogram my brain. I was used to sitting down and typing out my thoughts and feelings. When that stopped it was like putting my brain in a detox rehab program. And now that I have that outlet again my brain is on overdrive all the time. Seriously I could post 2 or 3 blogs a day right now. They may not be humorous, informative or even coherent but that is besides the point. My thoughts are swirling about so much. What is going on....what I am learning....things with my two sons....stuff with the hubby.....things at church......projects....I could go on and on. So with that said I want to just warn anyone reading that if you decide it is just too much to handle, that is okay. I am writing it for my benefit anyway.

So glad to be back!

Martha Vila Jr.

My brother nicknamed our mom Martha Vila several years ago because of her ability to decorate a home, cook a fine meal, and her love of power tools. She is handy no matter what you need. Need a new dress? She can sew it. Need a new haircut? She can cut it. Want a yummy cake? She can bake it. Hungry for a scrumptios meal? She can cook it. Want a new bedroom set? She can build it. So my brother, who is quite funny and witty, decided to name her Martha Vila (Martha Stewart & Bob Vila hybrid). It has been a family joke for quite some time now.

Growin up I always thought that I was alot like my mom. But the older I get the more I realize that I am very different in alot of ways. My mother is a very detailed and observant person. I am not. My mom put a new picture in her bathroom several months ago. When I commented about it she told me that it had been in there for over a month. Oops! My mother enjoys planning and seeing every detail carried through. I do not. Tell me what to do and I will do it but please do not ask me to plan it. She likes things done right away. I am more than willing to let things rest until I am ready to do them. She likes everything precise and in its place. I want things tidy but there isn't really any rhyme or reason to where things end up. My mom never let us put stickers on anything in our home. Well...I have to say I agree a little bit with that one but I didn't really communicate it to my boys so now their windows are covered in tractor stickers. So needless to say she and I are different in many ways.

BUT I have discovered something we have in common ( besides our love for our families and the Lord). I love home improvement stores!!!! I love the smell of lumber and glue and paint. I love the sound a saw makes and the feel of power when I am using it. I am not knowledgable at all but I am learning. I like to use my hands and see something accomplished. Even right now I am typing with a bumb finger. I hit it numerous times yesterday while building a wall. It is discolored and it hurts. And yes, I said that I built a wall. It isn't a big wall. But it is a wall. I built it and put in our bathroom. I even leveled it and nailed it to the floor and adjacent wall. It is sturdy and looks good. So I am therefore naming myself "Martha Vila Jr. in training". My mom and I will be finishing out the bathroom with sheetrock and trim work and tile. We are refinishing a vanity and a linen cabinet. I am so excited to be doing it all. And I will be even happier when it is all completed and we have our 2nd bathroom back up and running.

So, I am off to put in some flooring!!!

Some Plans....

The hubby & I will be celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary this year. And we thought that renewing our vows would be a great way to celebrate. After all as I look back over the past 10 years I realize that we had absolutley no idea what we were saying the first time around. We were naive and so focused on the party afterward that we weren't really putting as much focus on the vows we made before God and everybody as we should have. We knew there would be good times, and just knew that the "bad times" they mentioned were for someone else. We were banking on the "healthy" part and were hoping to avoid the "sickness". And most definitely we were focusing on the "richer" part. Well after nearly a decade of marriage I have realized that you have to take the good with the bad, there will be sickness and health, and we are still waiting on the richer part. The important thing is that we are together, we are more in love with each other than ever before. We have finally grown into our relationship. We have moved past the "I" and now are a "we". I want to look into my husbands eyes and say our vows again, this time knowing and understanding what we are committing to. Will it mean that we won't have issues and problems? Nope, but it will a reminder that we are together because we choose to be and because of that we will choose to work out whatever needs to be worked out.

Our anniversary is still a few months away but I just wanted to mention it today. I also wanted to mention that I am on a quest to lose 20 pounds before our anniversary. I want to look beautiful and feel beautiful. And right now neither of those is happening......My mom told me yesterday (in a loving motherly way) that I needed a make-over. Ouch! She wasn't being mean or anything. I think she just was mentioning that I am not living up to my potential in the beauty department. So I will be starting a new "lifestyle change" I guess.

Now I need to go clean my house. Seriously, it is not a pretty sight today.

Momzilla on the loose!!!

I woke up this morning and the sun was hiding, my kids were whining, my hair just would not do right. My pants are too tight, I have over plucked one eyebrow, my house looks like a bomb went off. Did I mention that the sun is hiding?
If there were a soundtrack playing in the background it might sound like the theme from Jaws with a little pirate garble thrown in for effect.
I have no reason to feel ticked off, but I do. I am not homeless, I am not hungry, I am not thirsty, I have enough clothes, even if they don't fit right now because of the over abundance of food in my house, I am not cold....we have electricity and heat. I am not struggling to pay bills on my own while having to be mom and dad to my two sons. I am not worrying about a loved one that is fighting a war so far away. I am not having to beat the pavement looking for a job. I don't have to borrow money to pay my bills or ride public transportation. So what is my problem? I think it is because I woke up this morning like so many other mornings.....feeling so selfish and self-centered that it makes it almost impossible to see things the way God does. The Word of God says that we must renew our minds. It doesn't just happen. It also says what things to dwell on. So here they are:
Whatever is true
Whatever is worthy of reverance
Whatever is honorable and seemly
Whatever is just
Whatever is pure
Whatever is lovely and lovable
Whatever is kind
Whatever is winsome
Whatever is gracious
Whatever is virtuous
Whatever is excellent
Whatever is worthy of praise
Think on and weigh and take account of these things!

So basically I haven't been thinking on the right things. I have so much to be thankful for, so many blessings are mine. Will things always be perfect? No, but I know the Perfector! And He says He will perfect and finish what He has begun. I know it to be true from looking back over my life. Now if I can just stand on that.

The sun may not be shining but its okay, because the Son of God outshines it all anyway.