Oh Give Thanks!

46 for rain that waters the ground and smells amazing!
47 for berries to put in my smoothie
48 for leggings that let me wear all the "too short dresses" out there
49 for church family
50 for watching my son sing with the other kids in church....so blessed!!
51 for quiet time
52 for still being able to learn and sometimes retain what I learn
53 for the Country Dollar and all of its wonderful jewelry deals
54 for the love that my hubby and I still share after 12 years of marriage
55 for the faithfulness of my God that walked hubby & I through 12 years of adjusting and learning what it means to truly love someone
56 for forgiveness
57 for restoration
58 for the promises of God
59 for the joy of the Lord
60 for the mercy & grace of my God

To Give Thanks

29 *for time with my hubby (even if he is bedridden with a angry back)
30 *healing - so thankful that the healing has begun and he is getting better
31 *for beautiful weather - loving these wonderfully pleasant temperatures
32 *for paper towels
33 *for my washer & dryer - oh so thankful
34 *for the ability to find out what I need to know with my fingertips
35 *for the unsurpassing greatness of the goodness of my God
36 *for listening to my boys sing a song to my husband and making his heart melt
37 *for brilliant authors that can intertwine a story with Biblical truth into a book that teaches and encourages as well as entertains
38 *for spellcheck - just saying
39 *for no-bake cookies....my new favorite
40 *for a week with my sweet nephew - what a treasure it was to have him
41 *for new beginnings and second chances
42 *for memories
43 *for hope of the future
44*for the gift of today
45 * my sweet boys and their love for each other

Thanks

To Give Thanks

11 *for my home and the comfort it brings
12 *for family that shares history
13 *for the new dress I bought Friday :)
14 *for Pandora that play praise & worship music all day long
15 *for my church and church family
16 *for Beth Moore and the joy with with she teaches
17 *for the fact that the Word of God is always relevant and applicable to what I am dealing with today
18 *for electricity
19 *for my flat iron
20 *for the smell of onions cooking.....yummo
21 *for the laughter of my children
22 *for the curiosity of my children
23 *for the love of my children
24 *for quiet time with my hubby
25 *for long talks with my hubby
26 *for friends, new and life-long
27 *for chocolate
28 *for the fact that I can approach my Heavenly Father anytime.

The Road to Graditude

I have decided to attempt once again to read One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. I have had the book for over a year and have begun reading it several times but always put it down when it began to step on my toes. I am determined to finish it this time. Perhaps I am ready at this point in my life to truly absorb the message and make some changes. So the first change I am making is that I want to begin each week on the blog with a list of at least 10 things for which I am grateful.

1.Jesus and the price He paid for my sins, shortcomings and failures
2.Grace
3.Mercy
4.Hubby & the knowledge that He is in love with the Lord
5.Our 2 beautiful sons
6. Knowing that both our sons have accepted Christ
7.Health & healing
8.Family
9.Music
10. God's Word, Bible

It is a start and I pray to continue to look around me and be intentional about my thankfulness of all that I see.  Ingratitude takes you down a familiar yet unsatisfying and lonely road. I don't want to travel that road any longer.

Drama Free

About a month ago the hubby and I decided to get out of debt and get caught up on our bills. Moving twice in a year gave our finances a bit of a sucker punch. But we are steadily climbing out of the pit. There are many lessons we are learning now that should have been learned a long time ago.....that is the funny things about growing up and maturing....if you don't learn the lesson the first time around, there will be one or more opportunities to finally pass the test.  (whether you want another chance or not). Anyway, we decided to disconnect our cell phones because we were just throwing huge chunks of cash right out the window. Especially since I can't use mine while at home....terrible service. I am sooooooo enjoying not paying that out each month. But it has had another surprise benefit. I had not realized how much pressure there is these days to be available to everyone at a moments notice. People are used to calling and texting and getting an immediate response. And if they don't, then they are automatically offended and wondering why you are avoiding them.....so much drama...too much for me. I have enjoyed being able to tell friends & family that we have a house number and leave it at that. If someone really wants to talk to me then they will call that number. If I am home, I will answer and if I am not home, then they can leave a message. If they are unwilling to do that then they probably didn't really want to talk to me anyways. I am getting so much more done and have been released from technology guilt. And if anyone ever came to my house they would notice that the house phone was dropped and no longer displays caller ID. So if I am available I answer, and if I am not, then I don't. It is nothing personal. I am just finally taking back my life. Now I can truly give my undivided attention to my children or anyone else that I am talking to without needing to text back a reply to a text I received.

Don't get me wrong, cell phones are great. I do not have anything against them. I am just enjoying my life at this time without them.

So that is my two cents today.

Still Here

I have been doing some thinking the last few weeks and have come to several conclusions.

1. You either write a blog trying to appeal to the masses or you write as a cathartic exercise for yourself. I have straddled the fence for several years and have found the my blog is a random, expressionless version of me and my life. I have shied away from posting things I am feeling and doing because I didn't really want to hear what someone has to say about it. I have also been leary of posting things about our family because there have been some folks that I feel are kinda "cyber-stalky"...you know who you are.....you know, those people who would like to be a part of you life but are not, so they try to get to know you through your blog?? yeah, kinda creepy! But if I don't start writing what I NEED to write then I am going to explode. So if you don't want to read what I want to write, then feel free to take my blog off of your reading list. It won't hurt my feelings at all.

2. If you don't really like who you are then a change in geography WILL NOT be the answer to your issues. Hubby and I moved 1200 miles away and back again in a matter of 13 months. While there are things about here that I prefer and several things about Kansas that I feel are better, I was in both places and didn't find contentment in either place. The last couple months I have felt anger, frustration and a general bad attiude. Needless to say, I haven't been the easiest person to live with.  I very rarely get to go anywhere by myself these days, but one day last week while running to the store to pick up a thermometer and Childrens Tylenol I had a revelation....Contentment has nothing to do with where you live, where you work, where you go to church, what hobbies you find enjoyable, how much money you have or even getting to live the exact life you feel you deserve....it is about finding who you are in Christ. Now, anyone with any measure of spiritual depth has probably already figured out that my relationship with the Lord at this precise moment is not what it should be. I have realized that while I missed our church here in Georgia, I was completely fine in Kansas. I had made some great friends, I felt like we were moving forward as a family. And moving back here has felt like a step backwards. The hubby and I are having the same conversations yet again. I am feeling the same frustrations I was feeling that led us to search for another place to live. And I would be lying if I didn't mention that I have been just a little upset about the whole thing. I know that at some point down the road I will look back and see that there has been a purpose in the whole situation but things are just not clear at this point.  You see, at my core I am a bit of a control freak and I don't feel like anyone asked my opinion in all this. (That is a lie, I know it even as I am typing it, but that belief is still there).

The answer??? There is only one true & honest answer and for some reason I have been avoiding it. Turn it over to God, lay down any plans I might have had at his feet and trust that He will resurrect what needs to be raised up again. Seek Him and spend time in His presence. AND IN THE MEANTIME BE THANKFUL, BE THANKFUL & BE THANKFUL.

On the road.....time will only tell where it will end up.

Here is a blog post I wrote almost 4 years ago that just reminded what it is all about.