As a Christian I want to make sure that my responses and reactions glorify God but what does that mean exactly? Does it mean to just stay quiet? Does it mean to speak up? Lay out an ultimatum? I have been confused. And it would be a HUGE understatement to say that it has affected my worship, in my alone time and in corporate worship with the body of believers at church.
There is one word that keeps coming to the front of my thoughts.....INSECURITY. At first I brushed it off and ignored it but it just won't go away. So today I am going to jot down what I feel that word has to do with why I am struggling.
I have learned that insecurity is a two-edged sword. We all think that it just keeps us from stepping out and trying new things. But I have found that it also has a tendency to make others super control freaks. There are some that are so insecure in themselves that they shrink from change, they want to stay comfortable and not try new things. The reasons and excuses for this behavior are as many as there are people but it all boils down the fact that we don't think we can do it. We think someone else will do it better. We don't believe in ourselves so we don't step out. And this affects how we interact with the people around us. We may not stand up for what we believe is right, we might not volunteer to serve, we don't step out to learn something new, instead we settle. We settle and then despise ourselves everyday because we aren't brave. We look in the mirror and wish we were different, that we were braver and could step out.
Then there are some of us that are insecure and the way it manifests in our lives is with an overpowering controlling attitude. We want to do everything ourselves. Not all control freaks are this way because of insecurity...some are arrogant and prideful.....and others are just trying to keep their heads above water. But today I want to talk about those that are controlling because they are insecure. It all boils down to the fact that they are afraid of failure and are afraid someone else might be able to do something better than them. They are insecure about their abilities and gifts and instead of delegating tasks and working cooperatively with those around them, they instead insist on doing everything themselves. They overwork themselves and are resentful that they have to do it all, but they just can't let others help them because someone might outshine them. Their insecurity keeps them isolated from community and fellowhip with others.
How sad. God created us all unique and with many different giftings. No where in the Word of God does He say that one gift is better than another. We are to encourage each other in the gifts God placed in us. We are not to compare. We are to work together to accomplish the work of the Gospel. One man or woman cannot do it alone, even if they think they can. It is just impossible. We need Christ and we need each other. We might wish we had a particular gift but instead we should look at what God wants us to do because that is when we will be most effective for the Kingdom of God. Don't try to be someone you are not. And don't blindly step into something just because someone else wants you to do it. No one else knows you like the One who made you. Ask Him what you are to be doing. Even if it makes someone else upset. We are to please God first. And it is only in doing that we will be fulfilled and walking in joy and peace.
Know who you are in Christ. Seek Him. Find out what He says about you. Don't let insecurity keep you in bondage and in limbo. God is teaching me that when I know who I am in Him, the world that swirls around me will not rock me. I will be able to stand firm and respond in a way that gives God the glory. And I will be able to relate to others around me, especially others in the Body of Christ in a much healthier more fulfilling way. Insecurity is just another word for FEAR. And God says that we don't have to fear. He has already won the victory. He goes before us and prepares the way. He will walk with us and lead us through. Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is FREEDOM! (2 Cor. 3:17)
Let's stand up and walk in the liberty of Christ!!!
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